A New Life

I turned 35 last weekend. Happy Birthday to me.

In a lot of ways, I feel like I'm just now starting my life. It's all brand new. The last year has been full of learning and growing and becoming something better, and it feels like a birthday is the perfect symbol of that.

It's exciting.

My birthday was about as low-key as you can get. I worked the night before and the night of, so I came home from work and crawled in to bed. There I stayed for the entire day, napping to my heart's content. Honestly, I think it was the perfect birthday. :-)

Having a birthday so close to the new year makes for some serious self evaluation and contemplation all at once. The good part of that is I get it all done at the beginning of the year, and don't have to worry about it for 12 months. What? That isn't the way I'm supposed to do it? Oh, well. *giggle*

This year I'm really happy with things. There is always room for improvement, and I have a list a mile long of things I want to accomplish over time. I'm being nice to myself and not putting time limits on any of it. I want to do one thing every day to either accomplish a task or work in the direction of getting it done. That's it. As long as I can say I did something to move myself in the right direction every day, I'm happy.

And boy, that feels good.

~....and that's all I have to say about that....~

One Thing I've Noticed....

...is that the longer a person goes without posting on their blog, the harder it is to get back into the swing of things.

I've written this post about a million times, and I haven't been satisfied with any of the drafts. Like I said, it's harder to get back into it after a stretch of time off.

Things have been going well here at the Barefoot Cottage. We survived the "end of the world" on 12-21-12, though Little Sprout was very disappointed that there were no zombies at all that day. Seriously. She cried. The holidays flew by, and we still aren't done celebrating. We have 2 more celebrations to get through before our "holiday season" is truly over.

I have started planning this year's garden already, even though it seems silly with a couple feet of snow sitting on top of my garden beds. I took last year completely off gardening, and I missed it more than I can say. I really needed the break, and I don't regret it, but there is something so wonderful about fresh veggies you grow yourself. Besides, my grocery budget groaned under the weight of store bought fresh veggies. Yikes!

The new year has started, and soon my Sprouts will be heading back to school. I have noticed that not much has changed from one year to another around here, but my attitude certainly has. I'm happier, more hopeful. I'm excited for the new year and what it will bring.

~...and that's all I have to say about that....~

It's Hot...

...and that's about it.

Really.

Life has been going on, without much to talk about. There is a line in "Legends of the Fall" where One Stab says something about how it's harder to talk about the happy times. Ahhh, here is the quote: It is hard to tell of happiness. Time goes by and we feel safe too soon." I guess this is what he was talking about.
Things are going well, though the gardens are neglected. It's so easy to forget that I still have flower gardens when I haven't planted my veggies this year. It was just one of those years. I only had so much time, and it ran out before the garden was in. I can still do some short season veggies, but with the oppressive heat (the weatherman says "tropical", I say "suicide if you're out in it) and humidity are sapping every ounce of interest in weeding and planting right out of me.
The Sprouts are struggling with the sameness of summer days. Somehow, having endless time to do whatever they want has resulted in them not wanting to do much of anything. So they fight. Hmmm, not the best use of their time, in my opinion.

All in all things are just.... steady.

I know chaos is just around the corner. Soon VBS will start, then Big Sprout is heading off to South Dakota. When she gets back from that, she will be heading to camp, and after she gets home from camp we are all heading up north to a cabin for a week. By that time, the back to school craziness will have started, and this is Little Sprout's year to start kindergarten.

Yeah, kindergarten. She is so excited. To tell the truth, I am too. The thought of having her at school running off her energy and asking all her questions is like a little slice of heaven. I am imagining naps that last longer than 20 minutes, and being able to clean the house without having to work around her.

Just wait. The first weeks of school I will be paralyzed with loneliness. ;-) I won't know what to do without her constant chatter and mess making, I'm betting money on it.

So anyway, that's the update on what's going on here at Barefoot Cottage. Sorry there isn't more.

~...and that's all I have to say about that....~

Holy Cow! I Got Pinned!

K, so I know I've been really neglectful around here. Blame Pinterest. Seriously. That stuff is a time-suck of epic proportions.... but SO much fun!!

Anyway, I did a quick little search, and found out that my crochet hook case has been pinned!!!

Yeah, I'm way more excited than I should be. I wonder what else I could post about that would get me pinned?...

The Day After

Black Friday. The big shopping day. The day when we begin the Christmas season, and all the chaos that goes with it.

I slept in.

Yesterday was a big day. Family here, taking Big Sprout to her other family, getting the Christmas decorations up after all our guests left, out to a movie... yeah, I was busy.

I did look at the Early Bird shoppers parked at the Walmart parking lot as we drove by last night. I couldn't believe that many people were crammed into the store. Mr. Barefoot asked if I wanted to stop. I told him no.

My brain isn't working. That's okay, because the decorations are up, the twinkle lights are on, and it takes almost no brain power to heat up T-day leftovers. This girl is not cooking again till Monday.

Just So Y'All Know....

I can't seem to comment on anyone's blog. I keep getting an error page stating that I am not authorized, or some dang thing. I'm still reading, though!

Where I've Been

The truth? The truth is I lost my way. For a long time. For a really long time.

I would love to tell you about all the exciting adventures I had while I was gone, but even my immense imagination is not up to the task of transforming months of sitting on the couch with dust collecting on my nose into a story interesting enough to read.

I would also love to tell you that I have returned to the world of the living, and that all is well now in my world. That, sadly, would be a lie. I can only say that I have begun the journey back, taken just the first tentative steps, and I am choosing a different path this time. One that may (or may not) make this my last journey out of the Land of Lost. It's a process, and I will take it one day at a time.

I would like to say, however, that I have missed this. I have missed the friends I have made. I have missed the ability to share my thoughts and my life with all of you. And I hope I will be a better bloggy buddy in the future. One step at a time, right?

"See" you soon...

The Longest Day

I have had only a few hours sleep... maybe 5?... since Monday morning. I can always tell when I have been up too long, because everything just seems to go wrong.

This morning, I somehow managed to stab myself in the chest with the plug for the electric mixer at work.

I am impatient with Little Sprout, and she has chosen today of all days to watch a really stupid "Christmas Classics" movie on Netflix.

Our fish are dying by the handful. Not my fault.

I think I have stubbed the same toe 3 times today.

Yeah, sleep is good.

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

The sun is shining, and the snow keeps melting, but I am afraid there will still be drifts in my yard in July. This was a snowy year for us, and it seems that I will be staring out my windows at a dirty white landscape forever. My hands are itching to get in the dirt, and I am terribly frustrated that I can't. Well, I could. I would just have to shovel a few feet of snow first. And it wouldn't be comfortable if I did, since the ground is still frozen.

*sigh*

* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *

On the other hand, this past weekend I went out with a couple girlfriends from High School and had my very first Indian Food. The food was actually pretty good! And the company, of course, was excellent. We ended up chatting for quite a while at the restaurant, then heading over to a local book store.

While I was out reviving a mostly dead social life, Uncle Wolfie took the Sprouts for the day. They went to a movie, lunch, and even squeezed just a little bit of rock climbing in. Little Sprout came home so excited from her day... it took us hours to calm her down! I don't think Big Sprout and Uncle Wolfie will be taking her along often, though. It sounded like she was a pretty big pain in the backside the whole time. Poor Wolfie looked downright exhausted when he dropped them off!

Mostly, life is just bumping along here at the Barefoot Manor. I am looking forward to the end of the school year, when Big Sprout will be available to help out more around the house and with Little Sprout.

~and that's all I have to say about that~

Snow, Snow, and More Snow

It keeps snowing here in my part of MN. I wouldn't mind, if I could stay inside where it's warm, but it seems to want to snow on nights that I work. That means that, not only do I have to leave my nice cozy house to head off to work, but I have to go outside and shovel all the white muck while I am there.

Icky.

I really don't get paid enough.

I came home this morning and was treated to a sight that just warmed my little barefoot mommy heart. Little Sprout and Big Sprout had cuddled up under a blanket in Mr. Barefoot's chair, and were watching cartoons together. With as much as these littles fight, it was darn near a miracle to see them sitting together without screams coming from either of them!

Now I am just waiting for a break in the cartoons to start the naptime battle....

wish me luck!

Really? Over a Month?

I look at the calendar, then look again. It is so hard to believe that I have left this blog unattended for more than a month!

In truth, though, there has been so little to say. Anything I would have written here would have been a waste of my time to write, and your time to read. Really.

Even now, there is so little to say. Mr. Barefoot has had a birthday since I last checked in. He also had weight loss surgery. He is recovering well, and really enjoying the way the pounds keep dropping off. The liquid diet he is not enjoying so much.

We are preparing for the holidays here at Barefoot Manor, and for the first time in years I only put up one tree. Mr. P commented on it today when he came to visit. "only one tree? aren't there a couple missing?" he said.

If he was shocked at that, he was positively flabbergasted when I told him that I allowed Little Sprout to do the tree decorating.

I promise (cross my heart) to come up with something funny or interesting or moving to write about.... just not today.

Peace.

The New Notebook

The other day, I found a new notebook for myself. It was sitting there on the end cap, the last of it's kind, with a beautiful design on the front. I couldn't help it. I brought it home.

I have this passion for empty notebooks, journals, and diaries. All those fresh, unmarked pages just waiting to be filled with whatever I choose. It's magic.

Each new page is a beginning. A chance to record all the things that are beautiful, wise, and good inside me. An opportunity to start a new life, right from the moment that I write that first word. In this world of computers, email, and text, writing on real paper with real ink is a connection to the past. I can imagine all the women and men over the years who have recorded their thoughts and feelings in the same way.

I have been known to hold on to an especially nice notebook or journal for years, fearful of ruining it by writing things that are unworthy in it's pages. I will take them out, look at them, smell the unique scent of ink and paper, turn the pages, run my fingers over the designs on the cover...... but I won't soil them with unworthy thoughts. They are fresh and clean. It seems to be a terrible thing to fill such a precious book with messy handwriting and records of mundane events.

I don't know, yet, what will be written in this new notebook. I am itching to begin, though. I have chosen the pen I will use, and keep the book and pen near. Perhaps inspiration will strike, and I will find the perfect things to put in my new notebook. Or perhaps I will just carry it around for a while and enjoy the possibilities....

The Rain Came at 2:50am: A Children's Story

Last night, Lightning woke his brother Thunder by flashing the lights in his room repeatedly.

"Come play with me!" he cried, bouncing with barely contained energy.

Thunder mumbled and grumbled as he rolled over and covered his head with the pillow. "I don't wanna play" he replied, "I was having such a nice dream, and you wrecked it. Now GO AWAY!"

Lightning, like most little brothers, continued to pester Thunder until he was wide awake. Soon they were chasing each other across the sky, thoroughly enjoying their sport.

Their older brothers, Wind and Rain, were discussing the weather patterns in outer Mongolia planned for the summer of 2015 when Lightning found them.

"Come play with me!" he giggled, as Thunder came barreling around the corner.

Wind looked down his nose at the exuberant youth. "I don't want to play." he said, "There are much more important things to think about, you know." With that, he turned and left. No doubt he expected Rain to follow, but Lightning and Thunder held him back.

"You'll play with us, won't you Rain?" begged Lightning.

"I don't know, guys. You are always picking on me for being too soft. You don't like to play nice." answered Rain

"Aww, come on! We promise to play nice this time" rumbled Thunder. "We'll even let you pick the game."

Rain agreed that, perhaps, it might be fun to play for a while. After all, the weather in outer Mongolia was so dull, and 2015 was a long way away. There was plenty of time to iron out any wrinkles in that plan. And so the three brothers spent a very enjoyable night playing together in the sky.

And below, we had the best of all worlds. Soaking, life giving rain that caressed the leaves instead of pounding them. Breathtaking lightning that lit up the sky and burned the eyes. Long, rolling thunder that rattled the chest and could be felt through bare feet firmly planted in the muddy grass.

I wonder what game they played?

Tongue Tied

Today, two monarch butterflies were playing in my back yard. I wondered if, just perhaps, they were the two that the Sprouts released a few weeks ago.

I know they weren't, the odds are very much against such a coincidence, but it was a nice little fancy.

I watched two young squirrels chase each other around the yard, jumping on the swing set and each other.

I did laundry, I cleaned house, I put together bookcases for Big Sprout's extra room.

I slogged forward through the day.

I have so many things in my mind and heart, yet every time I try to let them flow onto the screen..... blech. I think it is just a case of being overwhelmed. I am feeling so much, thinking so much. It is all tangled together in my mind. I can't seem to pull just one thread free.

Baby steps. Baby steps.

Stumbling Blocks and Steps in the Right Direction

Shortly after writing my last post, I learned that a dear young gal I know (and would even call a friend, but don't tell anyone) had just found out that her 3 yr old son has a brain tumor. It's cancer. The doc's aren't hopeful.

It threw me for a loop, to say the least.

I spent days trying to figure out how to deal with the situation. Not what could I do, just how could I cope. While fighting to convince myself that the world is not the miserably warped, dark place that I usually think it is, I was given proof that good does not always prevail. While trying to believe that there are rewards for good behavior, it was being proven that you can do everything right and still suffer.

There aren't any answers, but I had to try.

I have done a few things right, though. I cleaned the house. I visited an old friend (which was harder than I could have imagined). Today I cleaned out the gardens.

There are other things in the works, as well, but I hesitate to talk about them. I don't want to jinx anything by speaking too soon.... Don't worry, y'all will know every dark little secret in this Barefoot Brain before long....

~ and that's all I have to say about that~

Are You Serious?

The Sprouts have been squealing with either joy or rage all day.

Little Sprout doesn't like her wardrobe choices, and keeps trying to change.

Big Sprout doesn't see the need for any kind of personal hygiene, and is very frustrated with my insistence on clean Sprouts.

Now Mighty Cat has usurped my place on the bed.

Somehow, work is looking like a place I really do want to be after all....

Happy Blogiversary!!!!

Can you believe I wrote my first little bit of Barefoot nonsense 4 years and nearly 1,000 posts ago? I have ranged through depression issues, raising the sprouts, gardening, my thoughts on life and the world, and I still find things to chatter on about when you all come to visit me here in my little corner of the blogosphere. Isn't that amazing?

Shut up, family, I do so know how to be quiet! And these folks actually seem to like my ramblings...

I have met some of the most amazing folks through this blog. To those of you have been with me since the beginning, and those who have just joined me (even those of you folks who stuck around for a while and then abandoned me *sob*), I wanna say thanks. Thanks for letting me chatter on about the craziness of a Barefoot Life. Thanks for commenting, and letting me know I am not just sending my thoughts out into a void. Thanks for sharing your lives with me, either through comments or your own blogs.

Just thanks.

Now, everyone raise your drink of choice (mine is my ever-present can of Mt. Dew, so don't think I am gonna make y'all have booze at work or anything) and lets toast to the last 4 amazing years, wonderful interwebz friendships, and another 4 years of even more amazing things!

Big Day of Not A Lot

This morning, I figured out why the A/C at work wasn't working.... five minutes before I left for the day.

I took Little Sprout to the park, and pushed her on the swing for two hours. Two hours.

I then went to my folks' place and weeded flower beds. This will be the year that my plants move from their house to mine. I swear.

I came home and weeded here.

So why do I feel like I didn't accomplish much?

Curses On You, Sunny Day!

How dare it be sunny and beautiful when I am so tired that I have toothpicks propping up my Barefoot little eyelids, and grey and cold when I have a day off and can actually accomplish something in the yard?! I call foul!

Where's My Get-Up-And-Go?!

I lost it! I know it must be around here somewhere. I would get up and look for it, but.... well, ya know.

Hmmm. Should I blame my work schedule? Maybe it's the Sprouts' turn to be blamed for my lack of "Git-'er-done-edness". What if I *gasp* took the blame myself!

No, can't do that.

I know! I will blame the way I slept last night! See, I woke up this morning with a crick in my shoulder. Nothing seems to help. So I can't do laundry or sweep up the dust-monsters on the floor. Vacuuming requires movement in that arm, so I obviously can't do that, either...

Man, I am getting pretty good at this!

*sigh*

Do you guys believe me? Yeah, that's what I thought. I don't, either.

We're Rich!

Yesterday, Mr. Barefoot brought home our meat order from the local butcher. We ordered 1/2 of 1/2 beef and a full hog. Holy Cow and Pig!!!!! Our freezer, all 27 cu ft of it, is full to the very top with meat and leftover veggies from last year's garden. Seriously. If I could find my camera cord, I would post a pic of the entire thing packed so tight that the lid barely closes. I am so incredibly happy! There is something so satisfying about a full freezer and pantry.

In other news, they burned the house next to us today. They started around 9am, and it is still burning now, at 9pm. I am sorry to see the house go, not because I liked the house so much, but because now they are going to build two homes on that same lot. I already have an issue with feeling like folks are looking at me over the fence from the houses around us, and now I will have TWO houses full of windows looking at me from that side of the yard.

Ick.

Big Sprout spent last night at her church for a church club lock in. She came home this morning after only a few hours sleep, and has been exhausted and slightly cranky all day. Now she has fallen asleep on the living room floor, in the middle of Movie Night. I can't decide if she would be happier if I woke her or if I let her sleep....

Otherwise, things are rolling along just fine here at the Barefoot Manor. I continue to plan my gardens for the year, and I haven't even killed any of the hostas and seedlings I have growing in the house. It is a miracle, I swear!

Peace....