And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. ~ Kahlil Gibran

Wednesday, September 02, 2009

The Story of the Couch

We have a hard time with couches here at Barefoot Manor. We once owned a gigantic sleeper sofa that Mr. Barefoot loved and I felt so-so about. It was something like 7 feet long, and had that super-80's mauve/blue/green streaky pattern on it. That couch had a sort of magnetic force that (mysteriously) only affected Mr. Barefoot's backside. Seriously. Once Mr. Barefoot's heiny settled on one of that abstract printed monstrosity's cushions, there was NOTHING that was going to convince him to get back up.

I was silently overjoyed when we decided to move to a THIRD FLOOR apartment and Mr. Barefoot agreed that the couch couldn't go with us. It weighed about 7,000 lbs, and there was no way we were going to be able to carry it up two flights of stairs (since our new building didn't have such modern conveniences as elevators). Even if we had gotten it all the way to the third floor, there was no guarantee that we would be able to fit anything else into the living room because of it's bulk. So we got rid of the couch, and I found a cute little loveseat at the thrift store.

Now, the love seat didn't have the greatest upholstery, but it would have been easy to fix that (I just never got around to it). It was sturdy and light, and I liked it. Needless to say, Mr. Barefoot HATED it. He refused to sit in it, and even brought home a chair from the lobby at his work so that he wouldn't have to sit on this loveseat.

When we moved here to Barefoot Manor, we once again started looking for a different couch/loveseat type piece of furniture. I don't even remember why. Mr. Barefoot found a loveseat at the local thrift shop that he loved. It was ugly as homemade sin, and in really rough shape. I hated it on sight, and even the low price on it didn't tempt me.

But Mr. Barefoot was adamant that this was the loveseat for him. I could have the cushy chair, and he would stretch out on his ugly nasty horrible loveseat, and life would be wonderful.

So I ordered a slipcover (yes, it was THAT ugly) and let him buy it. Big mistake.

Within just a few months, Mr. Barefoot refused to sit in it. The springs had totally given out, and he couldn't get out of it once he was in. I refused to sit in it because it was ugly and uncomfortable.

So it became a jungle gym for Little Sprout and a napping place for Big Sprout. It collected cracker crumbs and juice stains. It was really, really nasty.

Then yesterday I was at the thrift store when one of the guys carried a cute little 'grandma' loveseat out of the back room and set it out in the furniture section. I say 'grandma' because it has that muted floral pattern that my grandmother (and, I am sure, countless other grandmothers) has used on her furniture for as long as I have been alive. It is in really good shape, and the floral isn't so girly or stuffy that it bothers me. Big Sprout and I sat on it, and she was shocked at how comfy it was. I looked at the price tag, and realised I had a $10 off card in my purse for my next purchase at that particular thrift store. So I bought it.

Mr. Barefoot is going to hate it. This isn't too terrible, though, because he hasn't sat on any of our couches in years.

But now I need different curtains, cuz they just don't go. And my book nook has to be moved, since the chair that was supposed to be my reading chair has become Mr. Barefoot's TV chair. And I think the walls need to be painted.....a nice, soft green would be good. The movie cabinet has to go, as well as the exercise machine. I am thinking about some new lamps, and a nice rug for the floor.....

Poor Mr. Barefoot! ;)


RuthieJ said...

What a great post -- I chuckled all the way through (esp. thinking about the 2 horrible couches at my house that I would love to replace someday too). Good luck with your room makeover to accomodate your new loveseat Barefoot!

jenny said...

*ahem!* I currently have TWO couches in my living room because we just bought a "new" one at the thrift shop last week. We can't decide what to do with our old one, it's too good to toss-- the frame is solid oak, it's from the 50s and was reupholstered several times, and NEEDS to be reupholstered again (think 3 potty training kids and one dog). I think I'll call up an upholstery shop and see if I can offer it to them and they can do what they want with it.