Wednesday, April 06, 2011
I can blame my work schedule, and the exhaustion that comes with it. I can blame a disease, and say I am just going through a cycle of "down". I can blame a world that is more about "get" and "take" than "give" and "share". I can blame hot, muggy summers followed by frigid winters. I can blame Facebook and the distractions of virtual farming.
I am starting to remember what it was to have plans and hopes for the future. There is an awakening within me. Something stretching after a long slumber. A part of me that is feeling the return of the sun, and unfurling itself... reaching for that life-giving source. I can feel those parts of me rooted deeply in the soil coming back to life, bringing up from the awakening earth strength and a sense of place.
It seems I post this same post every year, how I die a little every winter and come back to life in the summer. It makes me think that I maybe should move further south... somewhere spring comes earlier and fall stays later. Somewhere I can feel alive like this for more of the year. Somewhere I can feel dirt under my bare feet and smell fresh breezes most of the year.
I know I won't. I couldn't leave behind my family. Everything I know is here. As much as I have loved my travels to other places, none of them ever spoke to me as "home". I love winter as much as I hate it. The long hours spent in darkness, the delicious sense of being wrapped up and warm in a cozy house when all the world is locked in ice. Winter has it's perks. There are snow days, and the pristine beauty of a field covered in fresh snow. There is the diamond bright wonder of frost-tipped trees in the morning light, and the tangled shadows of a full moon reflecting off a clean blanket of snow.
All that being said, I am glad it's over for another year. Spring is the Awakening. Spring is the time of new blooms, of a glorious haze of green that starts slowly and then (seemingly overnight) takes over the whole world. Spring is a time of mud, and mess, and the craziness of spring planting. Spring is a time of swollen rivers, and returning birds. It is a time of adventure, and hope, and thanksgiving for another winter survived.
I say "bring it on"!
~and that's all I have to say about that~