The Funniest Thing

I lost my voice. My severe allergies morphed into some kind of chest cold / bronchitis type thing. I have been spending my time desperately gasping for breath and coughing hard enough that I cover my eyes instead of my mouth out of fear that they are going to pop out and go rolling down the street without me.

It's actually nice to be coughing like this. It is an easy way to scratch that persistent itch in the back of my throat. Of course, I am also terrified that one of these times when I am coughing so hard in public I will lose control of my bodily functions or something equally embarrassing.

But I am okay taking the good with the bad.

Where was I? Oh, yeah...So I lost my voice. The funny part about it is that just the other day I was thinking about Big Sprout's Aunt and wishing I could be a little more like her. She is one of those folks who has the gift of making themselves heard without ever raising their voice. I am honestly in awe of her and all folks who have this gift. I come from a family of loud, bawdy folks. On my Dad's side, at least. I don't think it is really a bad thing, really. Well, not all the time, anyway. But I have always been a little envious of the folks who were naturally a bit more quiet. They seem so gracious and genteel. I, on the other hand, come off as some crude wench.

Well, now I have no voice, and I can tell you that I would REALLY like it back. Right. Now.

Little Sprout yells at me across the yard, and won't stop with her calls of 'Mommy, Mommy, Mommymommymommymommy' until she hears me acknowledge her. Well, I can't make myself heard from across the yard. So I have to quit whatever it is I am doing and walk over to her so that she can hear my strained whispers. At one point I got wrapped up in hauling some dirt. When I looked up, I saw her jumping on boards that had nails in them. Rusty, nasty old nails. Could I yell at her to get off of them? Oh, no! I had to run all the way across the yard and grab her.

So thank you, gods of the perverse. I am now grateful for what I have, and you can GIVE IT BACK, ALREADY!

Thank you.