Today I had a long discussion with my good friend Sunny. She was bemoaning the fact that it seems her entire life revolves around raising the kids and keeping the house, and that she is afraid her husband will forget that she is a woman with interests and goals outside of that.
I am not sure what I said, but she seemed very happy to realise that her life will not always revolve around small children and the household chores.
I wish I knew what I said. I think I could use a dose of my own advice.
It's not that I worry that my whole life revolves around the house and the kids. It's that I want it to more, and I can't seem to do that and work so much at the same time. I had thought, when I took this overnight job, that it would be for 2-3 years. I had planned to be able to work overnights and still handle the household chores and spend quality time with the Sprout and Step-Sprouts. I had thought that we would buckle down, get out of debt, and get ourselves a house. I figured that after we had the house, I would work for a while to pay down the mortgage and make sure we had a good financial cushion, and then I would be able to get myself a nice little part time job while spending most of my time with home and child-rearing tasks.
Ha, the joke is on me. Here I am, four years later, and I am just NOW getting going on the things I had planned. We are still in debt, we now have another Sprout to contend with, and I am still 2-3 years from being able to quit working these awful hours.
Oh, what a mess.
Still, hope springs eternal, I suppose. It seems that the purchase of our own home (or some male hormonal thing, how am I to know) has brought Mr. Barefoot into the "yes, we can" mentality of things, and with his help I am hoping to make great strides towards my goal of being debt free this year. We have talked about me going back to school. I like that idea, though it is entirely dependent upon what kind of financial aid I can get. Which, of course, could be seriously affected by the mess our economy is in.
Anyway, I am glad that I made Sunny happy. It is always nice to have happy friends.
4 comments:
The main thing is that you keep your chin up and stay focused. In time, you will reap the rewards of your of efforts.
That is nice that you helped your friend. Sometimes when you are with children all day,with endless house work,cleaning,cooking and a lot of other chores, you think is this all I have to look forward to.
I was lucky enough to be at home raising our children. We had to do without a lot in order for me to be home, but I will never regret it because raising children is one of the most important jobs you will ever have.
I don't know how you do all you do and work at nights?Make sure to take extra good care of yourself.
Remember too, that the world, and our economy, is very different than it was even a couple of years ago. I bet most everyone has had their plans changed, and not for the better!
A least Mr. is on the same page with you now. That will go a long way towards getting you were you want to be.
If you end up going back to school, we can trade pencils and stuff!
Pam-
I understand how SAHMs can get discouraged. Maintaining a home is one of the most thankless tasks out there, and the work is endless.
Lisa-
*giggle* I only wanna trade pencils if you have cool ones. They gotta have sparkles and stuff on 'em, or fuzzy things on the erasers....
I have a pink pen that has a spring and a fuzzy star on top that bounces along with your writing. Want it? I made Stud Muffin sign some legal documents with it as it was the only blue ink pen I had. He was not amused!
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