That would be me, just lately.
Remember I mentioned that my best friends, Loopy and Mr. P, bought a house about 2 miles from Barefoot Manor? They picked out an old farmhouse on 5 acres with outbuildings and sheds and animal enclosures.
I am jealous because they got something closer to what I wanted for about half of what we are paying for Barefoot Manor.
Oh, I know all the logical reasons why Barefoot Manor is better for us, and I love it. Truly I do. The reason Loop and Mr. P's house is so cheap is that it is a fixer-upper, and Mr. Barefoot and I decided early on that we would not raise our kids in a home that was constantly under construction. We aren't really all that good at home-improvement stuff (though I COULD be, if I had a little more practice and wasn't so dang lazy). We are cheap folks who don't like to hire out work to be done.
I get it.
Well, my head does. My heart keeps telling me that WE could have a cheap fixer-upper in the country, and then we would have room for all the things I want to grow. I fantasize about being able to quit work and spend my time making a home instead. I keep thinking about that dream I have of a little homestead, of living close to the earth I live on, of knowing where almost every bite of food I eat comes from.
Of course, if I would have managed to get the land and the home before I started popping out Sprouts, things would have been totally different. We could have done things in the CORRECT ORDER, and been set up with a home and the homestead I wanted before changing schools and extra bedrooms became an issue.
I am happy with what we have. It is more than I ever thought we would accomplish. It's just....
Well, it's just that I am a little jealous.
Ugly emotion, jealousy.
The funniest part is that I know Loop and Mr. P are a little jealous of us sometimes. They want Sprouts, and have had no luck. They look at our lives as being so settled and domestic.
Funny thing, perspective.
Anyway, I am just working on ideas for my own little "urban homestead" here in town. I figure maybe I can get the best of both worlds.....