I have discovered a new sort of torture that puts thumb screws and all that stuff to shame. The trick is to make the person torture themselves.
What I mean is, if you want to wear someone down let them have children.
Seriously. What could be worse torture than being exhausted to the point of feeling ill, laying your child down for a nap and racing (well....shuffling maybe) off to your own freshly made bed with crisp clean sheets and a comfy warm blanket only to hear the beginnings of a full blown tantrum from the child's bedroom? If you weren't a parent, you could be sleeping. If it was someone elses kid you would only have to stay awake long enough to call the parents and warn them that they had to pick up their kid ASAP or it would end up chained up in the backyard. But no. It is your kid, so you have to get up and do whatever it takes to make the kid happy. Food? yeah, sure. Diaper change? got it. Snuggle time and a story? Whatever. The worst part is that you did this to yourself and you love the very creature causing all this discomfort. Talk about torture.
I am in awe of folks who enjoy this whole parenting thing. I mean, I love my Sprouts. I just don't love being a jungle gym/ punching bag/ snot rag/ janitor/ zoo keeper.
I can't wait for GrandSprouts. Those I can play with and then send home.
Oh, and Big Sprout, if you are reading this...you still can't even think about boys till you are at least 30. Don't go getting any ideas.