And forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. ~ Kahlil Gibran



Monday, September 25, 2006

Ups and Downs

With everything going on around here lately, I am sooooo tired! Each day has been filled with huge ups and downs emotionally, and while I am not complaining (about the ups, at least), I am definitely feeling the effects.

My dear dad brought home a truckfull of hydrangea bushes for me today. Well, they are for his yard, but they will be my job to care for and see that they grow and hopefully thrive. They are a gift from his mother, a woman with more flowers than I can count. I am very excited about this, and hope that they get settled into their new home before it gets too cold for them. Grandma says they should be fine, as they have suffered all sorts of torture at her hands and survived the experience. I still reserve the right to worry a bit and fuss over them, though. We will also be transplanting several lilac bushes to form a hedge around the property line at Dad's place. Everything I have ever read says that heirloom (read "ancient") lilacs don't like to be moved or disturbed at all, but we have done it several times at Dad's place and they never seem to mind. Hopefully the new hedge will discourage their new neighbor from driving through their yard and hosting parties in the veggie patch! Of course, he is young and has more testosterone than brains so he may just drive over the plants. Of course, then I get to go kick his butt (something I have wanted to do since he moved in), so maybe it will be worth losing a few plants over the whole deal!

DD went fishing with a friend of the family yesterday...the same one who took her last time. She came home with two northerns, both solid keepers! She was of course very proud of herself, and I got to hear all about the epic battle to get them reeled in and into the boat. She is definitely a born fisher-person. School still goes well for her, though she is having some social difficulties. I am going in to talk to someone from the school about it tomorrow. Parenting, though rewarding, is so much work and worry! DD has been having wild mood swings and periods of acting out...generally acting as if she is "stressed to the max" and taking it out in worrisome ways. Now I am stuck trying to walk the line between letting her figure out how to deal with the stress of life and being the overprotective mommy. All I can do is my best and hope it's enough.....

My belly continues to grow, though I am still measuring very small for 34 weeks gestation. Really, if I wanted to I could still wear the pants I was wearing before I got pregnant! I am not saying it would be comfortable, but I definitely could do it. The doctor is hoping to induce me at 38 weeks so that I can have my surgery. I think he is concerned that the baby will not grow due to my extremely low calorie intake. I am all for it, as I would like to be healed for the surgery in time for Thanksgiving dinner. I am also getting impatient for the newest member of the family to arrive. I find myself looking at the crib or the baby swing and just wishing so hard that my littlest one was already in it. I know that once baby is born I will have days when I wish I could stick the bun back in the oven just to get some rest, so I am trying to be patient. I just fill my hours with housekeeping duties and dream of a time when we have our own place and I can devote all my time to taking care of my family. It sounds so funny to hear myself say that. I never wanted a marriage or family until I had one, and now all I dream about is a farmhouse in the country where I can take care of the garden, animals and house all day long. I must be ill.

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