Yup, I am feeling sorry for myself lately. I don't know, it might be the season or the lack of sun and outdoor exercise, but I am just tired. I feel cruddy. And that makes me irritable.
It is so easy to get angry when I feel like this. I am overwhelmed by all the work that needs to be done. I hate not having a routine. The house needs to be cared for, the kids need attention, I need to work, the holidays add their own brand of stress, there are irritable and thoughtless people everywhere (due to the holidays). It seems everyone wants a piece of me, and there just isn't enough to go around. I have so many things I want to do for me, so many things I want to accomplish, and somehow the days just fly by without it ever getting done.
But, I have to deal with the truth that most of this is my own doing. I am the one who had the baby, resulting in the continued need for me to work overnights (daycare costs are crazy). I am the one who bullheadedly resists changes in my eating and exercise habits that would almost assuredly give me more energy. I am the one who puts all the pressure on myself to always do better, to do more.
Not that it helps much to beat myself up, either.
Anyway, that's about all I have for today. Sorry it isn't too fun.